Home > Your Personal Side > Are you a Stress Junkie? When your Inner Zen goes South.

Your day begins as any other. You crawl out of bed at the crack of dawn to make breakfast for your entire family, get your kids off to school, , get ready for work, drop off your dry cleaning and put out 4 major fires via cell phone, all before 9am. Sound all too familiar? It might, and it probably seems fairly normal, but when is it too much? We have all heard of and even known a few addicts in our lives, but I for one had never heard the term stress addict. According to new research, stress, much like chocolate, alcohol and even shopping, can give you a feeling of euphoria. A stress high sounded a bit like a bunch of hooey at first but, I soon discovered this is not only a real problem but according to some psychologists, stress addiction can be just as damaging to our bodies as cocaine addiction. After some research and major soul searching, I discovered that I too stood on that imaginary line of stress addiction and teeter tottered on being a junkie.

What is a Stress Junkie?

Are you a Stress Junkie? Take this short quiz to see if you might be exposing yourself to too much stress. Do you dread taking a vacation from work, even a short one, for fear that there will be more work when you come back? Do you try to squeeze an unreasonable amount of tasks into one day? Do you believe that you work better under pressure? Do you feel like you are truly accomplishing something if you are very busy? Do you leave things to the last minute because you know it will be easier to get done with a little pressure? If you answered yes to more than one of these questions, you could be on your way to stress addiction.

According to Martha Beck, “Stress junkies are people who, without even knowing it, use their own physiological responses as a mood-altering device.”. When we find ourselves in a stressful situation, our body releases hormones like adrenalin and cortisol into our bloodstream. You know that feeling you get when you seal a major deal at work or the way you can pull an all-nighter at the office after learning of a doozie of a mess-up? It’s that energy or “high” that makes you feel like you can do anything, that you can really accomplish something great.

Although some stress is necessary in our lives, like many other stimulants, moderation is the key. You can’t eat the whole bag of Oreos without some repercussions. Likewise, things can become dangerous when your body is overloaded with stress chemicals day in and day out. When you are riding high on these hormones you are less likely to think of being hungry, tired, or depressed, making it easy to neglect your body’s natural distress signals. Scientists have shown that stress can take its toll on your immune system, make you more likely for heart attacks and high blood pressure, and more susceptible to developing ulcers and other stomach problems.

Whip Up your Own Stress “Cocktail”

Things really got interesting when I found that some people even find ways to create their own “stress” just to get the high. Beck says, “Stress junkies indulge their habit in any number of ways including, procrastination, perfectionism, obsessing about obligations, and inventing catastrophic fantasies about what could go wrong.” For me, a 12-step program is sounding very appealing at this point in my research.

So why are we doing this to ourselves?

For all the same reasons that people overeat and run up hundreds of thousands of dollars in credit card bills, to avoid something. Emotional wounds can run deep and many people try to cover them with stress. Also, some individuals create their own stress to avoid addressing issues of self discovery and awareness. It might be “easier” to obsess about work, cleaning, or home just to avoid what’s really bothering us. It could also be a search for “lost love” that sends us into a stressed out rage. Seeking sympathy from others through stress is one way to get some needed attention. Scientists believe that as children, some individuals only received love and attention when they were sick and now as adults, they seek love through stress. Know someone like that? That crazed person who is always upset, angry or scared about something - Henny Penny in his prime.

Stress is a safe place. It can make you feel important, needed, in control of situations and even in control of other people. All kidding aside though, many people feel helpless and bound to their stressful situations. Even the thought of removing oneself from their everyday adrenaline filled days is enough to send some people “off the wagon.” This may all sound crazy, but doctors are sure that stress is just as dangerous as diabetes, obesity and heart disease.

You Hit the Wall

This would be that juncture that Oprah refers to as her “Aha Moment.”. That point in time when the lights come on and you see yourself from a different perspective, or it may just be that you’ve found yourself at the end of your rope, with your 5th cup of coffee in one hand, tying a noose with the other. In order to avoid serious illness, burnout and depression, you need to first take care of yourself physically. Eating better, limiting stimulants like caffeine and alcohol and getting plenty of rest can be a good start. If you are ready to look deeper you next must determine why you are thriving on chaos in your life.

An Intervention

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The stress hormones flooding our bodies make us want to do something. They are made to protect us from danger. You know, that fight or flight thing, eat or be eaten. And one of the best ways to release stress is to move. Run, walk fast, exercise, whatever you want to do, just get moving. Letting some of the steam out can deflate your stress balloon before it pops.

According to Beck, one of the last things you want to do is tell yourself to just be calm. “Stress junkies try to break their habit by telling themselves, stay calm! This is like trying to put out a fire with gunpowder.” When you find yourself about 3 seconds from explosion, tell yourself that it’s ok. Simply accepting your inner beast will stop him from getting too carried away.

One of the smartest things you can do is to learn a simple two-letter word, “NO.” Limiting your “to do” list and letting go of some less important tasks will force you to keep things to a minimum and in turn keep your stress under wraps.

Stress is Going No Where

Stress cannot be completely controlled. We need some stress in our lives. It can help us push a little further, like for that promotion you’ve deserved. But too much of anything is a bad thing. Look out for these important warning signs:

• Chronic headaches
• Body aches
• Upset stomach or bowel problems
• Difficulty sleeping
• Excessive worry or depression

If you’re like me, you might use the New Year as a great excuse to dive into some of these questions. Being a calmer person will help you to see more clearly and appreciate so much more. I’ve learned that most of the expectations I set for myself are just that, only my expectations. Seek your inner Zen before it’s too late.

Oprah Magazine “Am I Really-Gasp! - A Stress Junkie?” By Martha Beck, October 2002.
CNN.com “Learning To Chill This Holiday, Thanks to Work” by Rhonda Rowland. December 2000